Asshole Ankle

I remember as a child, the joy of leaping from trees, that high of free fall, the solid thud when my feet hit the ground. While I have never liked falling, it never used to slow me down. When my disorders flared and kicked in falls became devastating. My first serious fall was the first year I lived in Surrey. I was trying out for track and field, the relay race, and totally bailed into the gravel. It was my right knee that failed me then. I started seeing doctors shortly after that, I was 14 I believe.

Last night I had my first serious fall inside. I have bailed a few times when wandering about the forest and stuff but most of those could be traced back to a physical object of some sort making my uncooperative meatsuit fail.

Last night all I did was lift up onto the ball of my right foot to climb up onto my very high bed.

I felt my ankle give, it’s not an unfamiliar feeling. Since I severely sprained it dog walking it’s always been extra pissy. The issues with my metatarsal joints just made worse by my defective connective tissue being stretched out more by the injury. So that didn’t surprise me. What did surprise me was landing on my back on the floor. Usually I can compensate and kind of bypass it, kind of hauling myself up with brute strength.

I guess the combination of barometric pressure crash, plus exhaustion, plus everything flaring…but yeah. Regardless I hit the floor hard and while I have no bruises I am tender, both physically and mentally. I needed to use my cane in the house for the first time. Which also happens to be the first time I have used the cane I got from my Uncle, who passed away in November.

I had a good cry about it then put the new rubber bottom on. It’s a lot nicer to use than my all metal one, I assume because the wood absorbs some of the shock. I’m going to have to talk to the doctor about this ankle. Since getting my orthotics the ankle pain is rare. Obviously now I know it’s still fucky and I might need more effective hardware to protect the joint.

Annual Rheumatologist Appointment 2018

Saw my Rheumatologist today[Wednesday, September 12th 2018], here is the yearly update:

All labs are good.

My arthritis is very well controlled, can’t do much about Angry Ankle and Pissy Foot, it’s just life with arthritis. Meds remain unchanged.

Which are:

Hydroxychloroquine(dosage based on wright), Naproxen 500mg × 2 daily, Acetaminophen as needed, Cyclobenzaprine 10mg x 1 daily, Rabeprazole 10mg x 1 daily, Cannabis as needed.

The extra aches and pains can be attributed to my Chronic Pain Disorder. My Rheumatologist told me today she really doesn’t like the name Fibromyalgia because it implies muscle pain, when it is really a pain disorder. Things hurt. There doesn’t need to be anything specific even there for it to hurt.

Undifferentiated Connective Tissue Disease is still very mild. It’s not even something we talk about anymore.

She had not seen my physical or mental assessments from WorkBC. She agreed that, physically, I am capable of gentle part time work.

Was very insistent about me starting an exercise program. Just walking isn’t enough. Maintaining mobility as well as keeping muscle tone is important.

My arthritis symptoms are overall BETTER because I’m working part time.

Eyebrows are developing annual mild psoriasis. A new spot, about the size of a loonie, has appeared on my left ankle. So now my ankles match. It’s barely noticable right now but it was documented.

So overall my I’m holding up rather well in the physical department.

Sports Tape

So money is tight, I need new compression gloves and braces for my thumbs. I don’t have the approximately $200 I need for them so I bought a $6 roll of sports tape to try out. Works pretty good! Particularly for work where I still need some mobility. I’ve been warned the sticky stuff will irritate my skin over time but it works for now. Here’s my hands today. Below that are some pictures from last week.

Uncertainties

Once again it is time for a round of “What the fuck do I do?”.

I really do love my job. The time with the dogs is awesome and therapeutic, the walking is good to a certain degree but I WAY overdo it pretty much every day. I worry about joint damage now that I’ve been off my arthritis medication for so long. I can dope myself up to high heaven to get through the day if I need too get through the pain but it doesn’t stop damage. Living in a country with public medical care is fantastic, I’m frustrated though that because I missed my last appointment with my Rheumatologist in August that I have to wait until February to see her again. There’s questions I’d like to ask about pregnancy, let alone how to keep my joints safe while I am off my medication.

Remember the allergic reaction I had the other day? Well I had another reaction the next day while at work. Those two days I was working at the doggie daycare side of the business not just walking. I have a mild dog allergy that I really had never noticed before, I have been around or had dogs in the house my whole life. Apparently when you stuff a bunch of them in a building though and then have me sweep up the hair, THEN it becomes a problem, which makes sense. The hair and dander would probably make anyone react. It’s not even that it’s filthy or anything, it’s VERY clean but enclose everything and yeah. Issues. Good thing is now that I am not taking Lyrica or Plaquenil I can tale allergy medication without going into a drug induced coma. Not sure how that will work when I get pregnant.

I could very easily get a retail type job and make more money with considerably less work. I would lose A LOT of things though. With my current job I can stop and go as I need too. If I am feeling extra gross I can stay in the backyard with the dog or take it to the nearest dog park and they can run about. When the weather is the shits I only have to take them out to pee/poop and then we go inside to play. I can take my son with me to pretty much any walk if I need too. When I worked four hours at the daycare on the weekend he got to come with me and spend the whole time with me and play with the pups. This is not even touching on the fact it is a tiny local business that I work for.

*sigh*

Okay I feel a little better after dumping all this on the page. Thanks for listening folks.

October 7th, 2013

I’m back from one of my usual breaks. No matter how hard I try I can’t seem to write EVERY day and stop for months at a time in a pretty regular cycle. My most recent discovery is that really warm weather makes me really sore, the high pressure doesn’t get along with my joints. Still not as bad as when the weather turns crappy like it has been the last few weeks. LOTS of rain, seems Mother Nature is making up for the dry summer. With the cooler temperatures the pain and stiffness, particularly in my hips, feet, shoulders and hands. Certain joints in my feet have been giving me grief. The Raynaud’s Phenomena in my feet has gotten steadily worse, my toes are pretty much icicles all the time now. Drives me bonkers, I hate it. The cooler weather has also woken up the pain in my upper back, so I’ve been feeling pretty sore and tired and frustrated. There’s been no change in medication or anything like that. My body has almost completely reverted to it’s super food sensitive state. In December I will be going back to see my Rheumatologist, so I’m looking forward to that. Psoriasis is getting more noticeable on my scalp and eyebrows, still very mild though all and all.

July 15th, 2013

Things have been busy. The Little Man is walking and getting into everything. It’s also summer which means camping trips and such. I was feeling really good with all this heat. I did my best not to complain because it got REALLY hot REALLY fast. Something has gone funny under the surface though. It’s still warm but things feel broken again. I am seriously thinking about investing in a barometre so I get some warning at least. The burning pain of the infamous “T-Zone” has been mild. Hands/wrists, hips, ankles and feet have been bad. The second joint of my right big toe, the Medial Cuneiform, hurts A LOT and makes walking an interesting adventure…here’s a picture:anat13afoot

 

My shoulders have been pretty bad this week too. My right one is particularly pissed off, I did something to it picking up the boychild last night. I’ve been experimenting with only taking my afternoon dose of Lyrica if I feel crappy. Not sure of that’s affecting how sore I’ve been lately or not. Either way, it sucks. The Psoriasis on my head is getting pretty bad, I can actually see the red scaly spots now.

June 29th, 2013

Woke up in a lot of pain this morning, an 8-9. Bad stiffness, pulsing body pain, particularly bad in my hands and wrists. I’m exhausted emotionally and physically. I feel empty, drained. But I am taking great joy in watching my son crawl around the house, learning new things, surprising me with his comprehension. I asked him if he wanted milk, he nodded his head yes. I had suspicions that he was starting to understand what that meant, it’s really neat to actually see it in action though.

The reason I am feeling the way I am today is due largely in part to my day yesterday. My cousin, a cousin who I loved very much, was killed a couple weeks ago while operating heavy machinery at work. He was a young man with small children and a very amazing human being. His funeral was yesterday in Courtenay. Getting there involves a two hour ferry ride and a two hour drive both ways, 8 hours of travel. And then a very moving ceremony. While it has helped me begin my healing process, my acceptance of what has happened, it was exhausting and extremely hard for me.

So today is dedicated to resting.

Updated Diagnosis as of April 16th, 2013

Confirmed Fibromyalgia.

Confirmed mild Inflammatory Arthritis, undetermined kind as of yet, more than likely Psoriatic.

Partially confirmed Connective Tissue Disease, positive blood test, physical symptoms still minimal, sort of a “hurry up and wait” on this one, need to wait for more symptoms to appear.

April 9th, 2013

Went to my GP today to refill my Lyrica prescription. We both agreed that my dose should be bumped up to three 75mg pills a day. It was rainy and cold and I had to wait 45min for my prescription to be filled. My hips are killing me. Strangely enough I’m still up and cooking. Will be heading to bed shortly. OH! And my GP actually said out loud that I have Psoriatic Arthritis and Fibromyalgia. We will see what the specialist has to say on the 16th. It’s funny how getting a real diagnosis makes me happy.