I have to wear socks constantly or my toes go blue. In cool weather I need multiple pairs.
After my last appointment with my rheumy I’ve learnt how to identify all three types of pain I have now. Arthritis, Fibromyalgia, Connective Tissue. Lately it’s been the ligaments, connective tissues, skin, and such that are painful. It’s particularly bad today. A 7-8 on the scale. I’ve managed to get myself and the kids dressed and fed, gone to the clinic and pharmacy. Rather proud of myself for that. Still have some grocery shopping to do and getting the boy child his haircut for impending kindergarten.
I’ve taken all the pain meds I can. I’m thinking I might need to take a dose of cyclobenzaprine. This would involve weaning immediately though and I’m undecided if I’m up for that. Fuck it hurts though.
CW: poop, expletives
Look below the cut.
Ugh. That is the word of the day. It’s hot, we are having a heat wave this weekend. Highs in the 30C area, at night it’s about 15-20C. Wreaks havoc with my chronic illness. The kids had a rough week, the older is still having sleeping/eating/meltdown issues as well as teething (he lost his first tooth and the adult tooth replacing it is coming in fast), the younger is teething and growing so eating and waking a lot. My Mom brought me her old mobility scooter now that we’ve moved and have the space to store it, that’s been very helpful. It helped me get out to see her yesterday for her birthday. It’s now been a week since my surgery, healing is slow as I expected it to be (there’s a whole post in the works for that). I’m having issues getting up and down the stairs today. We got a good walk in though to loosen things up. There is a family gathering tonight that I completely forgot about that we aren’t going to. This has upset people greatly. I hate how taking care of myself leads to unhappiness and disappointment in others, let alone myself. I’m enjoying the time with my husband and kids today but I’m really unhappy about people being unhappy with me for taking care of myself. Well they aren’t unhappy with me personally, at least I hope not. Just sad about the situation. Thing is this same person gives me crap for not getting enough rest and self care and whatnot. Just feels like I can’t make anyone happy, least of all myself.
I’m seriously considering medication for depression again. Probably Wellbutrin since it will help with the smoking. I also need something for my Fibromyalgia, and need to discuss my worsening joint pain and such. My rheumatologist moved my May appointment to August. It will be almost a year between appointments. I am not pleased with my current quality of care. I can’t even find a family doctor close to my new home, I don’t think finding a new rheumatologist is going to be any easier. I need a vacation from life or something.
Gods my joints hurt so much, particularly my legs. I fell on Wednesday last week, full face plant onto the sidewalk, with the added fun of my six month old rolling into traffic in her stroller.
Good times. *sarcasm*
I had a scraped knee and a sore ankle, things have been hurting more as the days go along. Shoulders are bad, as are hips. Ankle and knees are now acting up, particularly on the right sides (the knee that hit the ground first when I fell). My spine has also been really painful.
Yesterday I pushed the patio door closed and managed to mess up my left hand. Spouse says it sounds like a work injury he’s had a few times. Seems to be nerve related. My whole left arm hurts though when it gets going.
The weather is shifty as well which never helps.
Uhm. What else. In the last four weeks we have painted, packed, moved, cleaned two different places, and mostly unpacked into our new place. Had my sons fifth birthday two weeks after we moved in.
Oh and I’m smoking 5-10 cigarettes a day currently.
Madness I tell you.
- Almost fainting
- Black outs, for a second or two, usually related to almost fainting
- Memory recall is getting REALLY bad, the “cut off” point, or where my memory starts to get really bad, are memories after my mid to late twenties
- Feeling weak/shakey
- New and worsening psoriasis, the white patching variety not plaques
- Mild swelling in ankles, wrists, fingers
- IBS flare
Gods I forgot what a major emotional episode does to my body. I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. Ugh.